Monday, 8 February 2010
low self esteem actually maturity!
Tuesday, 19 January 2010
im feeling bad...real bad and guilty!
What Do They Know by Tima Chavis
I face the world with a smile, no one knows what is hid inside.
They see only happiness, they cant see the tears I've cried.
When I am alone I hurt, because here I do it well.
In front of all the watchful eyes my heaven turns to hell.
The judge and jury awaits me, everyone has a say.
In a life that hangs suspended for yet another day.
Who are they to judge if what I have done is right or wrong?
In the end I gave him up, but inside still sing his song.
I don't know how to find the strength I thought I had.
If only I could play tough it wouldn't be so bad.
They say that life goes on and someday I'll smile again.
But, how do they know my pain without being where I've been?
I've traveled so far from home, and can't find my way back.
Somewhere along the way I must have jumped the track.
I saw him just today and his smile is still the same.
He looked at me so sweetly, but never spoke my name.
I wonder if he remembers me, It hasn't been that long.
He may have forgotten me, but I still sing his song.
this may seem more like a love poem.... but reflect me in more thn a million ways.... im alone here fr change but i dont think certain things change in life even wit time.or do they? people have started talkin .... n all it does is further damage.. do they even have a need to think from someone else's shoes? Its just that dad is damn depressed and that really hurts,,life is become such a question..i mean totally clueless , i cn go ahead jus the way i am, i know ive totally lost my originality, myself, dignity, my pride , chastity, name it and m clueless as to wat it is! thats the way ive become, so indecisive, so scared to make even small decisions, and i know i don have the luxury of being insane , i know i have to gather myself and act with sanity atleast for sake of dad n mum... dad isnt as normal, i mean he is always sad, complaining, and depressed and currently has a very low self esteem. I know causing him trouble at a stage he is mellowing down is pure torture, but i did all i could. Im so sorry people. to all those ive intentionally or unintentionally hurt in life...
Tuesday, 22 September 2009
Inner reenigineering retreat - Isha yoga center
After much persuasion i agreed to attend a self engineering program at the isha yoga center in the vellingiri hills .Thanks to the person who pushed me to do it. It was a total eye-opener ,i mean ive actually begin to see life in a different perspective... theres so much to it , that i'd definitely recommend anyone who is willing and daring to look at life in a slightly different way to go for it. Im planning to attend another of their program in the UK . I'm a person who is as logical as any other person but this whole thing is beyond any logic...I was jus introduced to this thing called ojas. i'm sure a lot of people lik me who never had a spiritual inclination might find it weird.But i think its essential for all of us to know things lik this, and the importance of a lot such things we consider nonexistent.The whole experience was refreshing. We went trekking and for the first time i actually interacted wit people of all ages and from various walks of life on a same platform.The first day all of us total strangers and the next day twas lik everyone knew everyone for ages. The hospitality extended by the volunteers involved in the program is really applaudable. I mean the food , the rooms , and people always there wit a cheerful face to help you is one thats stays in mind whenever i think of the program.On the whole its was a wholesome experience.althogh a few of us wer stretching for yoga after like ages.:)
Learning cooking!
hey since im of fr year of studies , ive started to learn to cook....yeah dream of an independent life is so near yet kinda far... this is wat i learnt today....Beetroot in yoghurt..... its a south indian dish..
